Forget Work-Life Balance And Build A Lifestyle

First post since August, welcome back!

You're absolutely right in that this is the type of environment companies should try to do, but the problem is that most of them either refuse to do so or don't know how. What can well tell leaders of companies to convince this this is the route they need to go to acquire the best employees. There are very few companies getting it right. Zappos was one, 37 signals was another. Who else? I've met plenty of people unhappy at Apple, and a slew of people who dislike working at Google.

I don't care what I'm working on unless I'm making 80K to coach collegiate baseball I'd rather be playing PS3, hanging without buddies and drinking beer. Sure if you were bold enough to let me do that in the breakroom, I'd be happy, feel empowered and bust my ass after hours, but what company would EVER let that happen?

Thanks for the warm welcome, Ryan!

It's an extremely tough thing to do. Most companies have a culture that basically tells people that a job is a job and your life is your life. They're scared to say, this should be your life, and you should love it!

I definitely don't have all the answers, but the best place to start is to encourage employees to befriend each other. Thats really what it comes down to. People thrive when they are in good relationships, it should be no different with your coworkers. Think of the best sports teams, I can guarantee that all those people spend hours and hours together, outside of practice and games, its what makes a team a team. Otherwise its just a chore.

You gotta convince people that doing a great job and working with your peers can be better than drinking beer, and if you really want, you can even drink a beer while your doing it!

-Ryan

"This was a great philosophy – in 1890. In the days of 8 hour shifts on an assembly line, everyone had work-life balance."

Probably more accurate to say, "This was a great philosophy—in 1950." The late 19th century wasn't known for eight-hour shifts.

I would argue that work as lifestyle is all well and good up to a point. But people need to have the time to experience the rest the world. Corporate America is heading in the opposite direction with minimal sick time, minimal vacation time, the end of paid sabbaticals. They don't want employee loyalty beyond the NDA because employees who stay longer than 2-5 years become more expensive.

This is exactly it!

My parents have always preached for me to find a career that will allow me to retire comfortably. But why would I want to spend 50 years of my life being miserable, only to beg for the day I get to retire?

The greatest reward is in making sure that everything you do contributes to a higher goal in life, and your career truly should play a role in that. This means that I want a career I would never want to retire from. Period.

So then the best employees are those without kids, without spouses who don't work for the same company and who don't have any obligations (church, volunteering in their community, sleeping) beyond work? Isn't there something to be said about having time to interact with people who DON'T have the same passions/knowledge/skills as you? You don't have to want to be at work all the time or even only engaging your colleagues 24/7 to have a good relationship with them. Heck, I don't have to be around my husband 24/7 to have a good relationship with him.

Sure…staying a couple more hours at work to get that sense of accomplishment from a job well done, to me, is worth more than going out for a beer. But is it worth skipping out on a vacation with my husband? Is it worth missing yet another of the kid's soccer games? Is it worth skipping church again? Much as I love my work and am passionate about it, I love other things in life just as much. I can sacrifice and scrape and scrap to make the company succeed, but just as in any relationship, there is give and take. Will my company let me neglect it when I need to scrape and scrap to make my marriage succeed in return? Or when I need to get the neglected kids through rehab? Or do married folks (or those with kids, faith based or community obligations) need not apply?

It's perfectly fine and human to be able to focus your energy on more than one thing in life. To expect people to be committed to work and only work – well, back in the day, that didn't work out so hot for my ancestors let me tell ya (smile). Just saying.

Bernadette

Ryan –

I agree about the term work/life balance and how separating the two is a losing battle. I mean after all nothing's better than life…so therefore work will always lose.

However, I'm a working mom…whose husband travels. There is no way I have time to leave work and hang out with co-workers. It'd be nice…and in my 20's and early 30's it was absolutely what I did. But it's so not going to happen now.

So I like Tony's theory and I think the culture he's created is great, especially as many of his workers are younger and are pretty much call center workers. But that culture will not fly in MBA, working parent world…it's simply a different world. I'm not saying they can't learn from Zappos…but they cannot replicate.

And honestly…I do want to take time off. I like spending time with my kid. But I also like working at the level of education and experienced I have achieved in 20 years. That's a bit more challenging to balance.

Hi Bernadette,

I do not think the best employees are those without kids, and of course everyone should have interests that do not revolve around work. Neglecting to spend time with your children or to volunteer, sleep etc. is not a good idea.

What Im saying is that when companies tell you to balance work and life, they are implying that you need to "escape" from work to go have fun and live your life. If you need to escape from a job, you shouldn't be in that job. Just like you say, work is like any other relationship and it needs to be treated like one. It shouldn't be a chore, just like raising your kids and volunteering shouldn't be a chore. If work is something you want to do just as much as you want to do the rest of the things in your life, you'll be more productive, happier, and the company will do better.

Also, why are all those other things considered "life." Is work not a part of "life?" It's really all about the lifestyle that you choose. The people who love their jobs make it a very important part of that lifestyle, those who don't are the people waiting for 5 pm to run for the doors.

Thanks for joining the conversation, I appreciate your perspective.

-Ryan

The struggle between balancing work and life activities is a subject that involves the dynamics of many cultures, not just that of the employer.

– The Individual –

First the individual brings to the table a set of expectations about the employment arrangement as it relates to life outside of the office. His/her culture shapes the decisions and level of engagement on many work related activities. A person may have a strong bond to his family and place a high priority around all family events. Another person may have a strong connection to a technology and she may want to attend user groups and national events. Yet another person may have experienced a failed relationship and to avoid the pain of loneliness works all the time.

Many times you will find that a individual works in order to have funds available for these interests. And that's about it. The will do just enough to get the job done so that they can go home and do what they really enjoy.

You will find people who are engaged for other reasons, as to advance a technology, build a career, or establish a company. Once they reach their goal, they move on. Their interest, no matter what is said, is not with the company, it is with their priorities.

– The Company –

No matter how you want to carve it, a company is just like the people who founded it – and our #1 goal in life is to survive. And for a company, that means, simply making money, paying the bills, and delivering products or services. A company is always concerned about its profit – which simply comes about in two ways, avoid spending or increase revenue – sometimes both. A company, again just like the people who founded it, forms a personality and set of priorities.

The questions a company has to ask that shapes its culture are:
– how do we treat our employees? do we build on their skills and interests?
– how do we treat our customers? do we listen and respond to their requests?
– what values to we hold on to strongly? do our spoken values line up with our actions?

– Culture –

It is simply a shared framework on "WWXD" – what would (person X) do? If you break it down, then you realize, it is simply about meeting a set of expectations about someone or a group of people.

The problem is that when you ask most people what you want in the culture of a company, they seem to always respond with incentives. One time I was interviewing a candidate and asked if he had any questions. "Do you have a thinking lounge and activity center?" I responded by saying that this isn't a hotel but a place of business. Later when I followed up with the recruiter, he told me that the guy had read an article to check out the "culture" of the company during your interview.

A mature culture realizes

* that not everyone "loves" their job, but know that everyone knows their impact on the bottom line and how valuable they are.
* that some people will run to the doors at 5PM and that's ok.
* that some people will stay as late as needed.
* that not everyone can make it to the pub after work and provides open forum for contribution after hours through internal forums or simply email.
* that people have kids, pets, parents, chickens, cows, computers, video games, fishing, skiing – and takes interests in them and supports them by being flexible.
* that some people want to grow and that some don't – just want to do their job as best as possible.
* it is about blending of cultures
* it is about doing what is right
* it is about being fair
* and in the end, it's about money

That last one may seem controversial, but it is a cold hard fact of business life. If Google or Zappos didn't make a profit, I'm sure the culture would be quite different – not to mention the number of employees.

People are looking for jobs. Jobs in companies that have a well established and mature culture.

Lifestyles are for magazines and TV shows.

Long time no post!

I would also like to throw in the point >> the rewards I should get from an employer should be equally rewarded from my employer – equal to the rewards I would get from seeing my kid play soccer, or helping out at a homeless shelter.

Oops sorry!

>> the rewards I should get from an employer should be equally rewarded from my "life" activities – equal to the rewards I would get from seeing my kid play soccer, or helping out at a homeless shelter.

[...] Forget Work-Life Balance And Build A Lifestyle (Employee Evolution) [...]

I am not going to defend the term work-life balance other than to say this is not an either or proposition. I see your point; indeed work is part of life and to live holistically is part of the goal here I think. But your approach is very assumptive. Leaving at 5pm because I have other equally or even more exciting/pressing things to attend to does not mean my eye is off the ball at work. It just means priorities interchange and it just so happens that for many working parents, or singles in grad school at night, or people with elderly parents to attend to, or people who have friends other than those they work with … you get the gist … that things happen in their lives that take them away from their desk at 5pm. Doesn't mean you hate your job. Doesn't mean you're not committed. Doesn't mean you lack passion or vision. Just means you have other stuff on. Simple.

The 8-hour day may be "so 1890", but this "build a lifestyle" push feels "so 1990" to me. It's going to ring a very familiar bell for anyone who worked in the dot-com arena prior to the bust, especially anyone who worked for a startup during that time. (Rock-climbing walls, Foosball tables, and cappuccino machines, anyone?) Does anyone really want to go back to that?

The problem was (and is, and will be) that it's an unsustainable philosophy. As others have pointed out, this all sounds very appealing when you're 26 years old and finally living on your own with a couple $50 bills in your pocket for the first time … but people mature, and expectations mature, and a work-centric lifestyle will fall out of favor with the very people who asked for it: GenY, who by then will also be the company's top talent.

They need to be best friends, they need to work around the clock, or at least be thinking about work around the clock, and they need to kick and scream and fight together, just to survive. Seriously, does this really sound like it will appeal to anybody for very long?