How I Cleared My First Career Roadblock

Published by Ryan Healy on July 22nd, 2008 in Career Development, Entrepreneurship | 6 Comments

"Bill. Sit down! Bill. Sit down! OK, don't."

"Susan! Sit down! Sit down!"

This was my lesson in leadership. First hand, in front of a group of 15 experienced managers, executives, artists and actors, my task was to command them to sit down. They weren't allowed to sit until they believed me.

I was at TAI in New York City attending a course called Communicating with Power and Presence. Originally started as a training studio for actors, TAI now uses acting principles to train business people to be more visionary thinkers and more effective leaders.

My goals were a little different. I wanted to learn how to command a room. I needed this skill: I'd become a public speaker. My speeches were about managing, recruiting and retaining Generation Y, so the audiences I presented to were much older than me. It was totally rewarding, but it was also completely intimidating.

I was in an interesting position because my speeches consisted of me standing in front of an experienced audience, and more or less telling them how to do their jobs. The only way for an audience to take me seriously was for me to command their attention and respect, and actually connect with each audience member – not necessarily an easy thing for a 24 year old to do.

So, after listening to Penelope Trunk rave about the course for months, I finally took the plunge and found myself at TAI, learning how to command a room and connect–by standing in front of a room full of people at least ten years older than me and commanding them to sit down.

Nobody sat.

Elise, our instructor and a former actor, told me to follow her lead. She punched the air. She screamed at the top of her lungs. And she stomped her feet.

I laughed and shook my head. But eventually, I followed her lead. I punched, I screamed and I stomped.

Then something clicked.

I pointed at Bill.

"Bill, sit down!"

He sat.

I turned left. "Susan, sit down!"

She sat.

One by one, I went through the entire room, truly connecting with each person and forcefully, but politely asking everyone to sit, until no one was left standing. Then, I gathered myself and said,

"Stand up!"

The entire audience stood.

I thanked them, and returned to my seat.

My heart was beating out of my chest. I felt completely ridiculous. But I also felt powerful. I felt like I had finally come full circle. In many ways, I finally felt like I was an adult.

As the course went on, I learned a lot about myself and a lot about other people. I watched each person go to the front of the room hesitant and nervous, only to sit down 45 minutes later with satisfied grins on their faces.

I learned that anyone can overcome what once seemed impossible. As I watched Bill, a 50 year old man, nearly break down in tears of happiness, joy, or maybe just relief, after slowly reciting his speech and connecting with every person in the room, I learned that anyone, at any age, can overcome what stands in their way.

At this particular point in my career, connecting with an audience was what stood in my way. The Communicating with Power and Presence course was my first step toward developing myself as a public speaker and a leader. As my life and my career go forward there will be other roadblocks and setbacks. But now I know there is always some way to clear these obstacles. The trick is to be proactive about it.

Whether its by taking a course at TAI, finding a mentor, or going on an extended vacation, figure out what's holding you back, and do something about it. Life's too short and there are too many resources at your fingertips to let anything stand in your way.

Leave your thoughts here. (6 responses)

This article´s comments All Employee Evolution comments

Michael Cortes

Jul 22nd, 2008 at 9:22 am

This exercise really strikes a cord with me. At the tender young age of 18, I joined the Marine Corps. During my stint we yunguns mocked, imitated, and emulated the STRONG powerful and did-I-mention LOUD voices of our drill instructors, teachers, and sergeants.

As I grew, I became one of those sergeants with my own loud and powerful voice that was not seen as anything but "normal". Yes, we still mocked it, in fun and jest.

However… one day, almost an exact year after leaving the Marines, I had a moment of self awareness. I was down in the dumps. I couldn't figure out why at first. Then it hit me. I had not raised my voice in a year.

It was then that I realized the therapeutic effects of releasing tension with your voice. I couldn't help but think that after following the lead of your instructor as she "She punched the air. She screamed at the top of her lungs. And she stomped her feet."… perhaps it helped you release the tension and intimidation involved so you could do as asked. While at the same time, it made it ok to raise your voice and put a little aggression/fortitude in your voice. Both which tend to be frowned upon in these days.

Either way, you certainly found a way to project authority in your voice. It is skill which I find many speakers trying to develop.

Ryan Stephens

Jul 22nd, 2008 at 9:36 am

Ryan,

First I applaud you for being able to deal with Penelope every day. Joking. Kinda.

But seriously, I applaud you for taking the opportunity and the necessary steps to become a more powerful, engaging speaker. I think that most people that are less familiar with your work/writing would contend that much of what you write borders on Gen Y entitlement, but they don't understand that you just want your voice heard so that you can actually -show- what you're capable of accomplishing.

Taking the class proves that you're doing what plenty of people in Gen Y won't do; by putting yourself in an intimidating situation you allowed yourself to grow and prosper. Congrats to you and keep writing passionate posts that I thoroughly enjoy reading.

Vanessa

Jul 22nd, 2008 at 9:55 am

I have to say that I relate enjoyed reading this post. My problem is less about conveying authority and more about speaking up in the first place. I am terrified of public speaking yet have no problem sharing my opinions one-on-one. Kudos for taking the problem head on.

Scott M

Jul 22nd, 2008 at 10:37 am

I have my doubt's about this stuff. Of course, I wasn't in the class, so I don't know everything that went on there. But what you described just seems silly.

I'm reminded of a demonstration of some martial artist who claimed that he could 'hit' someone without actually touching him. He gave some demonstrations with his students (who obviously idolized him), and they all fell down when 'punched'. Then he gave his demonstration to a skeptic. And the skeptic didn't fall down. The martial artist claimed that 'conditions weren't right' and that he was too tired to make it work.

I suspect that in the class people sat down or didn't sit down because they they were doing what they thought was expected of them, not because of some 'commanding presence' that you might have suddenly learned. People who have a 'presence' have it because they have been through enough experiences to be confident that they can handle pretty much anything. It's not something you can learn in an afternoon.

In the same way, public speaking is pretty straightforward. When you are knowledgable about the subject, you come across as confident. When you are interested in the subject, you come across as passionate. When you have practiced your speaking enough, you come across as natural. And when you have enough experience, you will have a bag of tricks to deal with the unexpected (technical glitches, unruly audience members, bad environments).

And you don't have to go stomping and screaming around a class like an idiot to lean that.

Jenn F

Jul 23rd, 2008 at 6:24 pm

Ryan –
It's great to see you developing your skills. No doubt, this effort will pay you back in spades. Even if the excercise may seem silly to some – if you walked away feeling more confident about public speaking – then you are.

Looking forward to seeing fruits of your labor. Good luck on your upcoming presentation…. oh, and don't let the fact that the a vast majority of the Fortune 100 might be on the line!

Milena Thomas

Jul 27th, 2008 at 5:15 pm

Interesting. As a voice teacher, I work one on one all the time, and I find it takes a few lessons to get comfortable. A lot of my comfort level is not about me, or the other person, but learning how they communicate. My communication techniques may be flawless with one student, only to fall on deaf ears with the next.

As a teacher, I've had to learn myriad ways to communicate, based on someone's ability to comprehend, or even their mood on that particular day. I've learned to keep distracted teens on task, or give brainy engineers a steady stream of information.

I find that until we "get" each other, both of us may stumble a bit.

I also think as a singer, I've had a lot of experience with audiences and energy levels. If I'm flat, they will pick up on it instantly. As a performer, or public speaker, I'm guessing the ability to constantly generate energy (which can be communicated different ways, forcefully or quietly) is of paramount importance.

Leave a Reply

  • Notify me of followup comments via e-mail
Social Resume at Brazen Careerist

Email Ryan