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Ryan Paugh graduated from Penn State in 2006 with a Bachelor's Degree in Journalism and a minor in Business. After working in corporate communications, freelance writing and reporting, he co-founded 
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Standing at a Crossroad: Am I Still a Millennial?
Because of blogging, my life took a complete one-eighty in less than a year. One day I was working in a cubicle, the next I was part of a startup. And as much as that whole scenario blew my freaking mind, I didn’t change via startup alone. The biggest changes actually occurred from within.
Events in our lives have a way of shifting our attitudes about certain things. Sometimes that’s bad, but then sometimes that’s really good. In my case, let’s just say that I’m a more seasoned millennial than I used to be.
And I think that’s a good thing. Because while I inherently see the world through the eyes of my generation, I’m starting to understand what Gen-Xers and Boomers are talking about.
No, I don’t think we’re a bunch of narcissistic brats all of a sudden. But I do understand why we’re sometimes misunderstood. Because as life takes its toll and we all grow up, I think we all find that our virtues mature.
Here are a few things that have matured with me during the past year.
I’m not as idealistic.
When I first read the cover of Strauss and Howe’s Millennials Rising: The Next Great Generation, I think I tricked myself into believing that we’re already just as stellar as my grandfather’s generation who kicked butt for all of us during World War II. But let’s face it, we haven’t proven anything yet.
I do still believe our generation has the potential to be great. But I’m pretty sure now that it’s going to take a lot more work than I originally thought.
A year ago I would’ve said that Generation Y is going to change the world and social media is going to be the vessel. Today, while I still believe that social media is a powerful ally, I’m not as naïve.
It’s going to take a lot more than tech savvy for Gen Y to make change the way we talk about changing things. We need hands-on action. And while a few critics pointed me to some great examples of millennial leadership, I still haven’t seen enough.
But maybe I’m demanding too much. Maybe we’re on the right track and just too young to take the reigns of leadership. That would be just fine with me. But in the meantime, I’d rather demand more than be satisfied with less.
I’m more skeptical.
When I first heard Barack Obama speak, I said to myself, “Wow, there’s the guy who’s going to save this country.” I was completely blown away. And looking back on it all, I kind of get mad at myself. I want to be smarter than that.
I no longer believe in the hype, I believe in results. Words like hope and change, used to give me goose bumps. Now when someone tells me they’re going to do something all I can say is “We’ll see.”
And that may sound like I’m lacking in hope, but I’m not. I’m very hopeful. In fact, I voted for Obama in the primaries, and probably will vote for him in November too. But I realize that actions speak louder than words, and I’ll definitely give the guy a hard time if he makes it into the Oval Office but doesn’t live up to all he promised.
The problem I’ve seen in myself and in my generation thus far is that we’re a lot of talk. And sometimes we believe in things without asking for proof.
But maybe that’s all we can do until we gain more momentum. I’m sure anxious to see how we turn out, but until then, we’ll see…
I’m not as bold.
When I started blogging, I used to run my mouth too much. I’d take something preposterous that someone said about my generation and respond with something equally, if not more preposterous. While shock and awe is typically a lot of fun, it’s better to be taken seriously.
Today I think things through. When I get a nasty comment from someone who calls me an amateur, sometimes I don’t say anything at all. It’s not always worth it to stoop to their level.
Why does this matter?
It matters because I refuse to give Gen-Y dissenters exactly what they want — proof that I’m a hack. Some people feed on their ability to fire people up. And as soon as we lose our cool, they get exactly what they want.
My new motto: Stay cool. Backlash is always going to suck, but as soon as I give into the hate I lose my leverage as a reputable voice.
I’m more myself than I’ve ever been.
For about a year after graduating college, I was depressed. Between leaving long-time friend behind and searching for a new meaning for my life, it was a rough spot in my life. Then things started to fall into place.
Over the past year I’ve experienced the ups and downs of a first job, endured startup stress, and learned a lot about myself. And I don’t want to toot my horn too much, but it feels awesome.
And at the same time, while all this awesomeness surrounds me, I wonder if I’m staying aligned with the values of my generation. Do I need a reality check? I’m really not sure.
Maybe I’m just opening up a new chapter. Maybe other members of my generation are starting to feel this way too. With all the garbage channeled our way via media campaigns, politicians and marketers there’s no doubt that we’re all getting a little nauseous.
So maybe I’m not alone. Are others breaking the stereotypes too? I’d really love to know, because either I’m losing touch or just headed down a different track.
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I think you’re right on track. While I’m a big reader of Employee Evolution and Brazen Careerist, I can’t help but laugh every now and then when reading certain posts. Don’t get me wrong, I love the exchange of ideas and the diversity of voices. But that’s all most of this is - ideas. We’re a generation that loves the big, resounding ideas, but we too rarely bother to get to the nuts and bolts of an issue. I think Gen Y can be great and has a very fresh outlook on life, but be patient everyone. Change doesn’t happen overnight and we still have a long way to go.
Also, being a part of Gen Y shouldn’t mean giving the middle finger to all ideas presented from previous generations. Gen Y, if anything, is about taking the best ideas, from the best minds regardless of status, associations, etc. You’re not losing touch with Gen Y as much as I think maturing to a point where you can better work with previous generations to actually accomplish something - not just spout off big ideas.
Ryan, thanks for bringing up the relationship between Millennials and this presidential election. The situation has been miscast over and over again to the point that I think we’ve all lost some perspective.
Barack Obama is on the cusp between being a Boomer and a Gen Xer. For all that we as Millennials have “claimed” him, it’s unfair for people to treat him as they do an idealistic and inexperienced Millennial. We should all have healthy skepticism about him and every other politician or leader, but that’s not the same as judging someone for using words like “hope” and “change” because we’re so afraid that they don’t mean it or that it’s just talk.
Please don’t vote against him because you’re weary of the buzzwords. By all means, look beyond them, ignore them completely, and do some research to figure out where he stands on the issues that matter to you. But I am sick of people who say that they are tired of the rhetoric and are going to vote for John McCain instead. President Barack Obama will not be a magic bullet that solves all of our nation’s problems and heals all of our wounds. It’s too bad that some people have built him up to that extent, because no one can live up to that, and he - as anyone put in that position - will inevitably fall short. But not buying the hype does not translate into voting for John McCain. While a future with President Obama will not be perfect, a future containing President McCain is a chilling proposition.
Ignore the rhetoric from both sides, do some digging to learn where they stand on the issues (their websites are excellent places to start) and vote for the one who you’d feel more comfortable making decisions that immediately affect your life and the lives of your fellow Americans. But don’t “punish” one for using buzzwords you’re sick of or for having unbelievable hype unfairly attached to him.
Ryan, I think it’s great that you are coming to these conclusions. We can’t help but be changed by the forces that surround us every day. While I still feel I am essentially the same person I was when I graduated college (and HS and 8th grade), I have definitely benefitted from and grown because of my experiences in ‘the real world.’ I like Tim’s comment where he said Gen Y is about taking the best ideas from all sources and making them even better. I see that every day at work with my Gen Y friends (I’m Gen X). I’m always thrilled at their enthusiasm and, the older they get, pleased to see them coming to the same conclusions you are.
Great words there. I love that fact that you are starting to play it cool. That is something my dad always told me. It’s always about how you react to situations. Shit happens, but what happens after the fact is what makes you strong. Sometimes doing nothing at all is the best answer.
As far as Gen-Y making a change, I just wrote about the same points. It’s not that we don’t want to make change, but really do many millennials know how to actually go out there and do it. I mean, stupid things like payroll and taxes for your start-up are challenging enough before you can even go out and save the world. We have been trying to go out and do it and it feels great. The mentors and Gen-X leadership that we have received along the way is what guides us to success and change.
As for Social Media. It gets a lot of hype. It’s a great tool, but that’s the key its just a tool. Your products and services still need to be great. Your sales team still needs to sell the product and you have to deliver on your promises. Just like your resume doesn’t get you the job, it just gets your foot in the door. You still have to sell you. But Social Media can be powerful. Getting conversation and community around your “great” product cannot be overlooked. But hey, I’m a guy selling social media, so I guess I am biased, but I do know it works.
Great article and it got me going this morning.
Ryan, what a terrific and earnest article. For whatever it’s worth, I think it shows a lot of courage go admit when you are starting to feel your philosophies shift against the party line.
In addition to the great comments already made, I want to comment on two things in particular:
Am I Still a Millennial?
Of course you are. But being a millennial won’t always mean the same thing. Your generation will always be unique, and bring its own singular perspective and penchants to society, but that doesn’t mean you’ll always be the polar opposite of the generations that preceded you. As Tim correctly (and colorfully) point out, being GenY shouldn’t be defined by opposing the other generations. To define yourself that way is simply a hallmark of youth.
I’m more myself than I’ve ever been.
Well there you go. In my opinion, that’s real success and freedom. To be free to be that person–whoever it is–should be the goal of every generation. With their activist and socially-conscious bent, the Millennials are already moving us even closer.
Thanks for the comments so far everyone. Instead of pointing out individual comments, I’d rather just supply a few thoughts I had after reading what everyone had to say.
Maybe Gen Y (myself included) needs to take a chill pill. We have all these ideas and we’re ready to make things happen right now. But change takes time, we need to be more patient.
Then again, maybe our impatience is good. Maybe it means once it is time to make a change, we’ll be ready. I guess that could backfire though.
One thing that I’d like to start doing in my own life is focus on the little things I can change. Because life is pretty stressful as it is, maybe starting off with the little things first will make it easier to deal with the big things later.
I hope that makes sense.
Thanks for the comments and support. It’s not always easy to be so truthful, but positive commentary definitely helps.
-RP
Ryan,
Great post. As someone on the cusp of GenX and GenY, I feel like I live a lifestyle borne from two generations.
The GenX side of me (the married, two stepkids, sensible car-driving side) loathes the gimme gimme attitude I see in a lot of 20 somethings. If you want a certain lifestyle, you’ve got to earn it; not expect it.
The GenY side of me (the Facebook, IMing, writing-this-comment-from-my-work-computer-’cuz-I-just-don’t-care) thinks that some GenXers and BBoomers need to just get over it.
I agree with Sean and any other EE poster that has mentioned that the older you get, the more your perspective changes. When you are in your 30s, you’ll look back at the fresh crop of 20-somethings and recall how things were different, maybe better, when you were that age.
I can’t say much more than what has been said in the comments, but in regards to the election and Obama and words and action…
As was noted previously in the comments, he is being built up to be all things to all people in ways that he can never live up to. But my worry is not that Obama won’t live up to the hype. My worry is that WE (the supporters who chant yes WE can and change we can believe in) will continue being a lot of talk and no action. I’m running for National Delegate to Denver in my state and I’ve seen more than my fair share of folks who talk a really GREAT game but once they don’t make it to the next round in the delegate selection process, they fall out. Get discouraged. Figure that “the man” is just always going to hold them back. I really wish there was a way to tap into the raw energy of this election and get people as motivated to clean up our neighborhoods as they are to stand in line at 5 am to go see Obama speak at 1 pm the next day. I wish there was a way to REALLY get people fired up about the power within themselves to “be the change we’ve been waiting for” instead of waiting (sorry for the offense here, but it is completely intended) as is the American way for someone else to be accountable and someone else to fix it.
For folks so blind to our own power collectively and individually, it is exciting to see “us” on the cusp of actually doing something. I’m right there with you on the “We shall see” front. But I’m not waiting to see how Obama will fail us or surpass expectations. I’m waiting to see how we will fail or surpass our own capabilities.
Anyhow. Yes. As you get older, perspective changes. I’ve been called a closet Republican for going on a decade now (I know, I know). But perspective is a sure sign that you were paying attention as you went through life and you took the bad with the good. That’s a good thing.
Love this post, Ryan. I think just because you’re maturing and adjusting to life in the working world and in your unique situation doesn’t put you out of touch with the Gen. Y mentality, whatever it is… I very much relate to your experience and I also feel a lot more seasoned in some of the ways you point out since I graduated from college two years ago.
I think your critical examination of typical millennial values are so important and well thought. The fact that you’re addressing these issues, even if it is to question them, shows you’re very much on the pulse of what it means to be a member of Generation Y.
Ryan, this is probably one of my favourite posts!!
I’m glad that someone with more influence in the GenY community is beginning to consider that we might not have all the answers. As Tim mentioned, I do love the BC community, but I frequently wonder how much of it is just rhetoric from a bunch of inexperienced college grads.
We’re all growing up, so no, I def. don’t think you’re out of touch w/ GenY, but I’m at the same point as you with regards to saying: “In my case, let’s just say that I’m a more seasoned millennial than I used to be.”.
Although we’re becoming more seasoned, we should be careful not to lose our optimism, which I feel is one of our greatest strengths! Some of us just have a better grasp of realism…
Cheers!
Ryan, this is the part of growing up that a lot of our generation has failed to hit yet, or at least has pushed off to accepting and learning for a while still. It’s really amazing the life lessons you learn when you’re trying to run your own business. I think one of the things about Gen Y is that because of post-secondary requirements, living at home longer, etc. etc. etc. (you’ve seen more of the research than I have), our maturation rates are behind that of our boomer parents and our Gen X cohorts. I think the reason you haven’t seen any the “Gen Y Leaders” and such is that we’re only NOW starting to find our legs. I think over the next 5-10 years you’re going to see a lot more of our generation starting to make an impact as we learn our way around the realities of the business world (which is very ugly most of the time). I do think we’re going to do some amazing things, but the expectations that we’re going to be doing these things *snap* like that is utterly rediculous.
As I noted in another comment here, the retirement of the boomers, and our generation’s numbers overtop of Gen X means that we’re going to be pushed into positions of power a lot sooner than was able for Gen X (that’s not saying we’ll be ahead of Gen X, but they’re going to get to the top a lot faster in the next 10 years than they did in the previous 30 and we’ll be following along in their wake), which is when I think you WILL see changes starting to *really* happen. That’s probably 10-20 years away though, in all reality. I’m not saying things won’t change before then, but in order for us to have the numbers and power structures in place to make monumental changes, we’re a ways off. And as someone else noted, hopefully we don’t lose *all* our idealism by then.
Bernadette, thanks for saying what I totally skipped in my comment but is extremely important: “My worry is that WE (the supporters who chant yes WE can and change we can believe in) will continue being a lot of talk and no action.” I feel the same way. An Obama presidency will be most effective when we carry our engagement from the election into energy for working in our communities, actively trying to bring the change that we’d like to see. Millennials are probably the most likely candidates to do that, but we’re also the least likely to follow through. And this is where my cynicism about our generation is most palpable - I just don’t believe enough of us will do that. I’m still an idealistic Millennial, but, like Ryan, I’m also a lot more skeptical than I would have been a few years ago about this same prospect.
That’s all well and good, but as you point out yourself…we need to DO more and SAY less.
So then, I challenge you and all other Millennials who read EE/BC:
– Accomplish one thing that improves humanity with no direct benefit to yourself before the end of the month. –
Ryan, you are my favorite millennial blogger. You truly reflect and take the analysis a step further; I think a sign of maturity is to take a step back from optimism and look at the reality of positives and negatives of ideas… and you do a great job of that.
I hope to see you guys if you come out to LA!!
Thanks everyone for continuing to write such insightful comments. It means a lot to see that I’m not alone here. I’m glad to see that others feel the same.
Erin: I think even though our perspectives change as we get older, some things will always remain the same. And for some reason I feel like we’d have a lot in common.
David: It’s so important to hold onto our idealism. I was worried that people would think I lost it all after reading this post. I’m glad that I haven’t really heard that yet.
Lex: All I can say is you made my day. Thank you.
Thanks to everyone else too.
-RP
This was a great post. I’ve found a similar struggle in myself, where I see my views and ideas changing and it was making me wonder if I really believed in anything or were just flip-flopping around issues. But I think you are right, our views are changing as we gain more knowledge. It’s easy to be idealistic when we’re sitting in a classroom with relatively few bills, small paychecks, and less pressure to provide a living for ourselves. Life in the working world provides more views and opinions that we can collate with our previously solid, idealistic opinions to form more realistic ones. I think as we come to more reaslistic goals for our world, they will be easier to make happen and then we can and will start taking the action that everyone craves.