Vacation Ethics

The dilemma is simple: I get next Tuesday off for Christmas (thanks, Christians) but I don't get Christmas Eve off. I have a Monday gap. The same goes for New Years and New Years Eve. These floating days off in the middle of the week sound like "well you'd take those weeks off anyway."

Wrong.

What if I don't want to take the time off? What if I want to get lots done while everyone else is at home? What if I don't celebrate Christ-related or late-night-binge-drinking holidays? I'm forced to shut down along with the rest of the country?

Okay, fine.

But I have no work to do on Monday. I have no clients to work with on Monday. Why don't we just get Monday off, too? Hmm, I'm faced with the following:

What would you do in this situation?

Working with Penelope Trunk, Part Deux — A Startup Reality Show in the Making

I want to start off today by talking about time. P has no concept of it, which speaks to the fact that she sees nothing wrong with working all hours into the night. And when it comes to catching flights around the country to promote the company, we sometimes run into problems.

I often find myself online tracking down flight details, hotel reservations or any other detail that might have slipped her mind while gallivanting around the country. She's lucky that I'm such a nice guy.

The other day, she called me from Denver. She was supposed to have a meeting with our friend Devin Reams. But she didn't know where or what time.

One thing P always yells at me about is how I never write things down. Someone needs to tell her to start heeding her own advice.

A couple of weeks ago I was a part of a panel for the World Future Society, Madison Chapter. Afterwards, a few of the members and I went out for a drink. And inevitably, everyone wants to talk about P.

Turns out a few of them had caught a speech P had given about a month back. I was there too, so I remember the topic well: "10 Ways to Better Your Career and Your Life."

Number one of the list was to have sex at least once a week. One of my drink-mates considered it to be a metaphor for just having a close personal relationship with another person.

"I'm not so sure about that," I said. "She was probably talking about just sex."

As any friend or foe to P's blog knows, she has no problem talking about sex. In fact, it's probably her favorite topic.

And I think that's cool. More power to her. She just needs to learn to keep it in the blogosphere.

Today she was sitting in the coffee shop — that is her office — with her friend Teresa and me. And all of a sudden the two start going on about their sex lives like nobody else is in the shop.

Usually you can tell when people are pissed at P. When she's talking too loud, somebody usually just tells her to shut up. But in today's case, nobody knew what to do. People either looked around the room in awe or tried to stare vigilantly at their laptops like they were deaf to it.

I just sat and laughed. She has already blogged about a rash I had, so shame just doesn't seem to make sense for me anymore.

Lately P has been saying we should start a reality show. And I have to say, it would probably be a real moneymaker.

It would be just as cool as the Real World. Except instead of a sassy, young cast, a fancy townhouse and a cool city we'd have the three of us, Healy and my grimy apartment and the snowy abyss that is Madison, WI.

We could even have that confessional booth where we all get to rant about what pisses us off about one another. But we'd probably have to put a time limit on its use.

Maybe there's a producer out there reading right now…if so, let's do lunch.

Read more about working with Penelope:

Working with Penelope Trunk — Tales from a Startup Soap Opera

The Top Three Corporate Hazards Facing Millennials

My favorite part about being a member of the Millennial generation is that we're determined to do things our way. We reject the customary '9 to 5' cubicle culture and anything else that bores us about the traditional way of doing things. And if we don't get enough of what we want, we'll simply hop to another company to get it from somebody else.

Looking from the outside in, it sort of sounds like we're all a bunch of self-centered brats. Hence, our media-proclaimed epithet of 'Generation Me.' Sure, there are those of us that are merely snot-nosed punks, but the majority of us are just trying to get a thin slice of the quality of life that would make us most content.

Yet still, there's hazards in demanding what was once taboo. Sure, as we speak companies are bending over backwards to try and recruit and retain us, but there will be hazards in our new system of work that even the strong Millennial mindset can't disrupt.

More Contracts, Less Benefits

When I finally got my first entry-level job after college I was surprised to find out that I wasn't 'really' hired. Technically I worked for an outside temp agency that handled the majority of the company's new hires. As it turned out, this was pretty standard in my field. When I asked why, they told me this:

• We don't have to give you benefits

• You get paid by the hour, not by salary

• We can fire you with fewer grounds than a 'true' hire.

As job-hopping escalates, I can expect that we'll see a rise in contract worker hires and a decline in true employment. It only makes sense when you're dealing with a restless recruit that's most likely going to leave within 6-8 months.

And still, there are benefits in contract work. Less commitment by virtue of being a contractor means you don't have to worry about someone finger pointing for 'lack of loyalty.' In essence, the company is as loyal to you as you are to them. Plus, you essentially make your own hours. And as long as the time sheet adds up to 40 hours or more by the end of the week and you're doing your job well, everyone is happy. Just be prepared to lose all of the benefits that come with being considered an actual, full-time employee.

Low-Level Work, Your New Best Friend

Unfortunately, companies aren't willing to train someone in high-level tasks when they know they're going to quit soon after. It's a paradox for Millennials in the workforce. We want to be trained in complex pieces of the business, but we're not always willing to make the commitment.

So low-level work is probably where the Millennial focus will lie. And regrettably, there's little upside here. You'll get to see a lot of tiny aspects of the entire business, but you're work will carry far less meaning at the end of the day.

At the same entry-level contract position I described earlier. People were always wary of handing me complex assignments. So I spent months perfecting the art of PowerPoint, memo writing and sending emails on behalf of other people. Towards the end of my assignment, I started to get more high-level work, but I had already given notice that I was moving on. Go figure…

The 'Stepping Stone' Complex

When people think that you're only in a certain position to gain the knowhow needed to move onto something better, they perceive themselves to be nothing more than a stepping stone in your career-climbing glory. And nobody wants to be stepped on.

Millennials have been pigeonholed as narcissists. Whether it's true or not, this creates just the amount of distrust necessary to scapegoat us as glory hounds. We're not seen as loyal members of the team and essentially, we lose the long-term connect many employees create within their work environment.

Whether this is true or not is up for discussion, because in many cases it's not. I personally created some long-term relationships in the corporate world that I hope I will never lose. But there were still others that I know were holding back because they knew I wouldn't be around forever.

With that said, it's important for me to note that we're an extremely elastic generation. Not one of these corporate hazards is enough to keep us from evolving into exactly what we want to become. It's just important to know what obstacles you're going to face so you show up fully prepared.

With the onset of a new, Millennial work ethic, the corporate world seems to be changing for the better. But as anyone in Corporate American knows, corporate change is a slow change. We can't expect things to be neat and pretty. Be ready to experience a bumpy road somewhere along the way.

A Millennial's Muse — Part 10: Who Moved My Neighbor?

Here read the true tales of a young twenty-something cubicle dweller by day – dreamer of "there's got to be more than this" by night – trying to find the moral of her everyday story. Walk with Jackie down cubicle lane every Wednesday as she humorously shares the pitfalls and high points of moving to a new city for her first job, building a life post 5 o'clock, and searching for meaning in every crevice of her stu-stu studio.

Dear Fellow Millennials,

During that beloved, quiet period before the holidays when half of the office was gone and all seemed relatively peaceful, I experienced a corporate slap in the face. It was uncalled for. It was callous. It was just plain dirty.

Not Without My Neighbor

I walked over to Neighbor's cubicle after Magnum delivered news that would rock my corporate existence.

Me: "Neighbor…I have some bad news."
Neighbor: "What is it, Neighborette?"?

Me: "I'm being forced to relocate to a cubicle on another floor (Neighbor's face dropped).

Me: "Can I sit down in your cube for a little while?"
Neighbor: "Sit and never leave."

Then I cried tears from the depths of my neighborly heart. (You think I'm kidding?)

"Here, Neighborette," she said, handing me a crinkled, partially used napkin with some raisin bran muffin residue from her breakfast (Neighbor loved bran).

Wiping the tears (and simultaneously contaminating my pores), I said, "I can't do it without you, Neighbor."

Neighbor: "We should quit."
Me: "I see no other option."

In the days that followed, we took our remaining time together seriously.

Me: "Neighbor…?"
Neighbor: "Yeah?"
Me: "Just making sure."

Me: "Neighbor…?"
Neighbor: "Yes, Neighborette?"
Me: "You're the neighbor of my dreams."
Neighbor: "Right back at ya."

Neighbor: "Neighborette, do you want to borrow my calculator?"?

Typing mailing labels and doing nothing related to computation, I said, "Sure, Neighbor…thanks for asking."

When I left my cubicle for the last time, I took a good, hard look at my barren desk – the overhead cabinets void of magnets and photos – and my swivel chair haphazardly situated between the desk and rear partition. I felt like I was looking at a crime scene.

Sitting in my new cubicle, I had that first day of school feeling when you don't even feel comfortable in your own desk. So this is what resettlement feels like, I thought to myself.

Diet Coke Demise

I tried to limit my soda intake, but a walk to the soda machine was precious time away from my cubicle. Diet Coke purchase #1 – the machine ate my money. I was left thirsty and felt defeated, viewing the experience as a metaphor for how I felt about my job.

In the days following, I saw people around the office drinking soda so I decided to give it another shot. Diet Coke purchase #2 – again a vending machine victim. Then I became angry and felt the onset of tears. For those who have ever been unhappy at a job, you know it wasn't about the money.

Annie from "Office Services" happened to be in the kitchen at the time of my being robbed.

"Annie, the machine ate my money."

Annie felt bad, but said that Office Services didn't handle the vending machines, and I should leave a note on the machine for the person who restocks it.

So the word "Service" in Office Services stands for what?

I went back to my cubicle, sat down and announced to surrounding co-workers, "The machine ate my money." I never thought I was the type of person to do this, but I went back to that machine with a note in hand that read, "I lost $1.30 in this machine. Please call Ext. 2479 or see Cubicle #7006," and taped it to the front.

Days later, I got my money back. Then I was the Diet Coke champion.

Love is in the Cubicle Air (not mine)

Switching cubicles gave me a new cubicle community (one I could have happily lived without). The cubicle dweller across the stained, carpeted walkway from me was quite loquacious and spoke to her mom at least four times during the day. Her vocal chords really seized the day after she-yaps-a-lot got engaged. Twenty-three years old, her first serious relationship, and they met online. I'm not judging (yes I am). I'm not.

The day following the engagement, I listened to her tell the proposal story at least 15 times – four times to her mom. They picnicked on the National Mall, he brought her favorite foods (one being falafel), and popped the question in hot pink icing on a chocolate cake (chocolate ice cream chocolate cake). She cried. If I heard correctly, and I believe I did, she "bawled."

Ain't no sunshine when Neighbor's gone,
Jackie

Two more ways family can help your career

I've written before about the benefits of moving home with your parents following graduation. Many people disagree, but I'm convinced that – as long as you do it for the right reasons – moving home after graduation is the most responsible thing you can do.

Of course, there are always those people who use mom and dad as a crutch and fail to grow up because they're living at home. But there are also a good amount of people that move home to payoff their $21,100 (on average) debt, and save a little cash before moving to a city and paying $1,000 plus per month for rent.

After discussing the issue with a few friends and hearing some interesting stories, I've found two more interesting ways to leverage your family connections following graduation.

The relative option

Matt Goldberg, of The Big Transition wrote an interesting post about "the relative option." Matt tells a story about his cousin, Jess, who graduated from college and wanted a job in PR. The problem was an entry-level PR job in New York would not cover rent and expenses. But her parents lived in Allentown, PA, and the commute to New York was not realistic.

So Jess called in a favor to her relatives who lived outside of New York City. She temporarily moved in with them and landed a job with the NBA. Not only did she score a great job, but she was near friends in New York, and she could actually enjoy a social life while paying off loans.

What a great idea! If mom and dad don't live in the most appealing city for a 22 year old, and your chosen profession doesn't pay enough to cover rent, figure out what relatives or family friends live in the area and ask if they can help.

I don't need this job, I live with my parents

A good friend of mine, we'll call him Pat, has been at his job for about two years now. The job started out great. He's been doing computer programming, learning new things every day, getting paid well and beginning to take on management responsibilities. What more could he ask for?

The problem is, Pat's been really bored recently. He's being assigned the same jobs now as he was eight months ago, but they're no longer interesting because he can do them blindfolded. He had his performance review the other day. Like usual, his boss told him he was doing a great job and to keep up the good work.

Pat replied, "Thank you, I appreciate it."

But then he decided to ask for some challenging work. He explained the situation and said that he was at the job to learn and get experience, and he feels like he stopped learning.

The company told him that it would take a lot of time to go through all the approval processes to give him some more challenging work. So Pat said,

"Ok, if I can't get new assignments, can I at least have a raise?"

Again, they told him no because it would take months to go through all the approval processes to get him a raise. Finally he replied:

"I live with my parents. I don't need this job. I want more challenging work, or at the least, I want some more compensation."

I don't think things are quite settled with the situation, but I would bet he's going to get a nice little raise or some new responsibilities.

The most interesting thing about this whole situation is that Pat was not being unreasonable. All he wanted was to continue learning! Since he couldn't do that, he asked for more money.

Sure, this tactic may sound immature or unfair to older workers who are responsible for a spouse, kids and a mortgage. But it's business, and just like your company will do whatever they can to keep your salary low, you do whatever you can to get the upper hand. Even if that means using the fact that you live with mom and dad as a negotiating tool.