Caught in between college and adulthood

Job offer or not, the coming days, months and possibly years after graduation we struggle to determine our place in the adult world. All the while, a part of us goes on wishing that we had just one more semester of college life left to hold onto.

That, my fellow millennials, is one of the hardest things we have to face – we're officially stuck in the middle of college and adulthood.

The hardest thing I had to face was moving back home to suburbia with my parents. Don't get me wrong, I love my parents. But when getting ready to go out with friends, I don't need my mother telling me that whatever I'm wearing isn't appropriate for the season.

I'm still in school mode. I prefer the days of blasting the stereo, borrowing from 3 roommate's closets and figuring out what spots we wanted/needed to hit that night. I'm just not a fan of feeling like I'm back in high school. Only instead of going to school, I hop a bus and go to work. Isn't a job supposed to make you feel grown up?

Going out now means seeing a whole new crowd of kids. My little brother will be 21 next summer. Yes, I'm pumped to go out with him, but that'll just make me yearn to be 21 again, instead of being the birthday boy's amazingly cool older sister.
The places I used to love I'm so over now. New places with older crowds have more of an appeal. If I go somewhere for college night, I feel like a sham, but I still, show my college ID to avoid the cover charge.

And who do I go out on the town with? Sure, some people from high school have now graduated and live at home again, but during college I enveloped a more social personality than they're used to seeing from me. So my taste for going out is different than theirs.

Coworkers are hit or miss depending on your department and social atmosphere. Plus, there's always the sticky situation of doing something while out that among twentysomethings would be deemed no big deal, but around those older and possibly wiser, you'd risk being the talk of the water cooler come Monday.

In college, there was generally a 5 or 6 year gap between the oldest and youngest students. Now, I'm the youngest at age 22 interacting with other recent graduates, newlyweds, new moms and dads, almost retirees and everyone in between. Talk about a generation gap!

And if that's not bad enough, I can't go more than a week hearing about someone my age becoming engaged. I feel behind. Almost like that now that I have the job, the next step is husband and quick!

But where should I look? I'm out of the college atmosphere so I can hope that a friend still in school might have some friends to introduce me to. Work is an option, but there's always that warning against dating co-workers (again…possible water cooler gossip). The last option leaves good old fashion fate which quite frankly scares me. A significant other (or at least some prospects) is the next step, but where to start?

The friendships forged in college over freshman floor activities, late night pizza, staking out tables in the library during finals week, gossiping until dawn and living together changed graduation day. For the most part, the people I was closest to in high school I've stayed in touch with. And I'm still in touch with college people, mostly ones I've lived with or had the same major. On the flip side, there are people from college that I would say hi to if I'd see them, but I don't plan on going out of my way to find out what they're up to now that we've been apart for 5 months.

Now that I'm living back at home, I'm closer to my family but feel out of touch with friends, especially the girls I lived with the last 2 years. Getting together every few weeks is nothing compared to the nightly dinner conversation dissecting our days. Dinner with my parents is nice, but let's face it, some things that you can tell your roommates and friends you can't discuss with your parents so time with the old roommates is spent playing catch-up and offering advice and a much-needed shoulder to lean on.

This whole in-between period is part of the growing up, but it's not easy. Most people in my same situation feel the exact same way. Now that they're out of school, they're supposed to act like a mature adult, but it's difficult to leave the school-minded life behind.

Millennials are Strategically Political

A question was broached here at Employee Evolution by one of the readers, who asked just how politically active Millennials are. While Ryan and I knew our own personal answers, neither felt confident enough to answer on behalf of our whole generation without some more data. Now that I've looked at the trends myself, I've found that what was superficially a simple question has a bit more of a nuanced answer than I expected.

Before I begin, I would also like to state that this is only in regards to America. While other countries may have similar circumstances, it would be beyond presumptuous and into the realm of arrogant to even begin to offer a global primer on such an issue.

Do not Compare us to Baby Boomers via the Vietnam Protests.

In short, it depends on what your definition of "is" is. If you attempt to compare our generation to that of the Baby Boomers (as Thomas Friedman does in his article Generation Q), then what you would naturally come up with is a picture of apathy. In the midst of a war that is extremely unpopular by the public at large, and with presidential approval ratings some of the lowest in modern history, you would expect us to march out of our classes and jobs and into the streets. Riots should be happening, and hippies abundant.

While the latter may be true on some campuses, the former hasn't happened because of one key difference between Vietnam and the War on Terror: A draft. While you can argue that the less privileged of our generation have to utilize the military as an economic decision and that makes it a hidden draft, because this would be an indirect culling, it doesn't elicit as much of a public reaction. And without larger numbers of our generation in war, there is simply not enough of a personal outrage to go from working within the system to breaking the system down entirely.

Looking at political activism among the Baby Boomers, you'll see that it is entirely absent in regards to various genocides and other acts of atrocity (The Khmer Rouge regime comes to mind). I am certain that if forced conscription were to occur again, you would not only see riots, but riots organized ten times as effectively than in the past due to social networking online.

Socially Conscious Consumerism

On the environmental front, bamboo and hemp clothing lines are expanding. The LEED standard, while maybe not being used literally, is still being used as a yardstick for an amazing amount of new buildings. Meanwhile, boycotts of products grown with forced or child labor are growing. According to studies done by Cone, Inc. and AMP Insights, our generation is one of the most socially conscious yet. Just in 2006, under a third of us have boycotted certain products from companies we disagreed with ethically, while 70 percent consider a company's social and environmental commitment when purchasing products.

While it is easy to characterize and diminish us by our seemingly "idealistic naivety" about how the real world works, we are growing into a generation that is using not only our personal time, but our own money to reinforce positive business models. As we continue to rise in income, and thus in contribution to the overall GDP, this effect will only grow larger.

We Tend not to Vote, Unless it Matters

While the percentage of voters in the 18-29 age demographic has increased over the past two elections, our votes relative to the older generations are still abysmal. Because of this, politicians have less incentive to appeal to our interests, which in turn makes us even less inclined to vote. Not to mention the issues that we feel most are most important (the war, education, the environment, and social equality) are by no means easy to solve in five-second sound bytes.

Another issue that drives down our voting, at least if questionnaires are any indication, is the rampant cynicism and hollowness of campaigning today. Young people have grown up with the Internet. Whereas the TV was a one-way interaction, the Internet allows for a much greater contributory culture. Because of this, we value compromise and negotiation over hard ideological stances; we're looking for results. This leads into the last factor that influences voting, structural limitations.

The one area we see young voters really participating is when they go to college or their parents live in a swing state. Often, the students will register in whichever state is more balanced politically, so that they feel their vote has more of a difference. However, local registrars in heavy college towns ultimately decide on whether many of these voters can vote, due to ambiguities in the legal term of domicile. While some places are deeply appreciative of the young voting effort, others have cracked down for various reasons. Ultimately, if districts were drawn to be more bipartisan instead of gerrymandered, you would see voter increases in all demographics, but especially in the young voter category.

So What Does it all Mean?

While I worry about how our fantastic volunteerism rates fall (heavily in upper-income households and among the college-educated), I'm not yet ready to call out that this is a class divide, nor that it is simply resume padding. Regardless of that possibility, our dedication to volunteering and single-issue campaigns is having an impact. Looking at the data, what I see is that we Millennials have a variety of opinions and causes, but we are driven in whatever they may be. We don't harbor illusions about the political system, so where it works, we use it, and where it doesn't, we substitute our own solutions. I spoke earlier about the lack of activism regarding the Khmer Rouge regime, and their nigh-genocide of a full third of Cambodia. A parallel can be drawn to the failure of governmental action in Darfur. However, if you look at the number of high school and college organizations sending aid, and the level of awareness, there is mounting pressure on the U.N. and A.U. to start to produce a measurable level of success in the region.

We may not hold a significant amount of power yet, but in the meantime, we aren't simply waiting our turn for the reins. In our own ways, we are already making a difference. Politics ultimately comes down to the people, and how we live together on Earth. To me, incorporating civic engagement and policy desires into a person's everyday lifestyle is far more inspiring than any one-time demonstration. I'm glad to see that among my generation, I'm not the only person that feels such.

Choosing a college major

An undergraduate degree has gone from an option that will get you ahead, to a minimum prerequisite for most jobs. After college, people are changing jobs and careers more often than ever before. Because of this, the field you actually major in has become increasingly irrelevant.

That being said, I believe the smartest thing a confused undergrad can do is to choose a major with a good job market. Here is why.

A first job is never easy to get

Landing a first job is difficult no matter what you major in. Considering today's job market, choosing a major like Computer Science, Nursing or Accounting makes your life much less stressful.

As long as you are somewhat interested in the field, give it a shot. If you choose a major with no clear career path, you could spend months on Monster.com not only trying to find the best jobs, but trying to find the best career to start in. It's not worth your time. Land a job you might like and enjoy senior year. If you end up hating the job, then it's time to find a new one. No big deal.

You will have many careers over your lifetime

No matter what you major in, it's unlikely you will be in the same field by age 30. College is not the time to figure out what you want to do with your life. College is the time to figure out how to manage your life. The real lessons you learn in college are how to manage your time and develop relationships with peers and professors. Focus on those skills rather than worrying about the perfect major and you will be successful in any field.

A long job hunt is worse than a bad job

Most of my friends who didn't have concrete majors and weren't quite sure what they wanted to do after school had the hardest first year in the real world. Searching for a job in whatever "dream career" they were chasing, turned into a stressful full time job itself. A better approach to take is to get your foot in the door with a first job in whatever field, and keep your eyes open for potential jobs in a more exciting field. You won't stress about needing to find a job, and who knows, maybe your will actually enjoy your first job.

If you like something enough make it your hobby

With all the free time that college provides, you may as well have a hobby. Choose one that could turn into your career. Major in engineering, but start a blog about sports marketing. You could graduate with a 4 year technical engineering degree, and be considered the young subject matter expert in sports marketing thanks to your blog. Then you'll really have your choice in jobs.

Ultimately, the major you choose will not dramatically affect your life. You can be successful no matter what you decide on. If you're totally stuck on choosing a major, research the current and projected job markets for a few fields, and choose one that might interest you. If it's not perfect, don't worry, you have the next 50 years of your life to figure out what you want to be when you grow up.

A Millennial's Muse – Part 1: Hello Cubicle, Hello World

Here read the true tales of a young twenty-something cubicle dweller by day – dreamer of "there's got to be more than this" by night – trying to find the moral of her everyday story. Walk with Jackie down cubicle lane as she humorously shares the pitfalls and high points of moving to a new city for her first job, building a life post 5 o'clock, and searching for meaning in every crevice of her stu-stu studio.

Dear Fellow Millennials,

A Millennial's Muse draws open the curtains of the window into my young professional's soul. Today begins an anecdotal series of revelations detailing the peculiar, perplexing and playful journey of the last 20 months spent in Cubicle #8032 somewhere in the nation's capital. Beginning with the deliberative acceptance of a job offer and ending with the awkward terrain of two-weeks notice, this virtual journal o' mine will contemplate work/life equilibrium ("balance" is so overdone), longer than legal lunch hours (please don't tell), happy hours redefined, family relationships when all members are now "adults," extracurricular amusements, and mo'(re).

Who This Be?

Who am I to be a distinctive millennial voice? I'm not much different from you, really. Perhaps shorter, as I barely meet 5'2" on the measuring stick. I experienced the quintessential first job after college and, like Billy Faulkner (is that rude?) said, I couldn't not write about the whirlwind of new feelings I encountered on the cusp of yuppie-hood.

Before battling with the forces of work, I went to the University of Florida where I attended three football games in four years. All three games were blessed with rain and allowed me to leave early, for which I cheered. I wanted to major in Interior Design, but my dad told me that I "would starve." You can't plan life, but you can plan meals is one of my personal mantras, so I was not keen on the prospect of famine. Instead, I opted to major in the ultra lucrative field of Sociology.

I think life has a novelistic quality to it, thus I'm a big fan of saying (and writing), "Story of my life." That phrase will meet your eyes many times. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Shall we begin?

You're Hired. Who Me?

When your brain is trained to analyze and interpret society, what kind of jobs are you qualified for after graduating from college? I would have loved to spend my days sitting on a park bench or in a coffee shop watching passerby and caffeine sippers, respectively, but since money does not grow on trees (Dad aphorism again) nor is it disbursed freely by baristas, I had to look in the direction of paid employment.

Program Assistant, Program Associate, Programming Specialist – I know all too well the effects of Labeling Theory, and I was about to become one if its victims.

My job search narrowed to two viable options with two very different employers. Washington DC is home to the headquarters of many professional associations that serve as membership entities and networking hubs (read: adult tree houses where anyone can feel like they belong) for people in their particular career industry. Job prospect #1 was with a management firm for associations.

DC is also fertile ground for universities, and feeling bitter about my severed ties with academia, I thought working on a campus could be a great fit for me. Job prospect #2 would give me the license to wear school-spirited attire once again. Silent victory cheer for hooded sweatshirts.

I had two interviews with both employers and, being the anticipatory person that I am, thought I needed to decide which of the two jobs (I hadn't even been offered yet) I was going to accept. Yeah, I'm one of those.

I placed phone calls to friends, family, former internship supervisors and anyone else who would listen to my holistic assessment of the pros and cons of each potential position. Knowing that neither position would serve as my career destiny but more as that must-have element to my resume (a real job), I wanted to include factors other than what I would be doing at my desk in the decision making process.

Job prospect #1 was with a company of 200 employees at an average age of 25 years old. Job prospect #2 was in an office with seven employees, five of whom seemed like people that might very well have been teased in middle school. Since I moved to DC not knowing anyone other than my older (and less mature) sister, the viable pool of would-be friends at job prospect #1 was enticing.

I also considered the hours of the work day, flexible options for start and end times, ½ hour versus a 1-hour lunch, commute time, the quality of eateries near the offices, room for growth, how safe I'd feel walking to the Metro if I had to work late, proximity to a yoga studio and other deciding factors I'll reveal when I feel like we're better friends.

And the Winner Is…

I received job offers from both prospects within hours of each other (told you so). I had of course made up my mind well in advance of even needing to, so the only question remaining was how to respond to the voicemail from the offer I wasn't accepting. Did I need to return the call or could I just send a polite e-mail? "Mom…?"

Advised that I should consider their feelings and the generosity of getting an offer (what is this, dating?), I called back job prospect #2 to thank them and say that I accepted another position. The woman on the other end said that she wished she had called me sooner. People, don't hold back your feelings. When you love someone/want them to work for you, carpe diem.

And there laid the first stepping stone on the path I would tread as an underpaid and overworked Education & Programs Assistant with an association management company in a nook of DC that would satisfy my food, safety, and yogic concerns.

Tune in next week for my big first day and hyper-analytical accounts of new office supplies, studio apartment living and getting lost in a 5' x 4' cubicle.

Professional in progress,
Jackie

Being a man in a woman's world – What it's like having a female boss

College parties, "March Madness" and fantasy football – just three topics my buddies chat about with their bosses to lighten the mood. I would've loved to have that kind of relationship at my first entry-level job. Unfortunately, my situation was different.

Since graduating college and working full-time, my superiors have all been females. Moreover, the majority of staffers on my first corporate team were women too. So ladies, when you complain about the male-driven work environment that leaves you feeling isolated and alone, I feel your pain.

At the risk of sounding sexist (again), if I ever return to the corporate world I really hope my boss is a guy – I'd learn faster, feel more involved and maybe even advance quicker.

The best teacher I ever had was a man

Think of the best teacher you've ever had. Why do they stick out from all the rest? If you're like me, it's probably because they found a way to connect with you on a personal level. It's also probable that they're a member of the same sex.

Of course, as we rise into the ranks of adulthood new factors come into play. Studies suggest that a superior mentor is one of the opposite sex – someone who probably finds you sexually attractive.

I, however, suggest that the influence of an older male is bound to hold more authority and respect in the work life of a younger male.

Is this comparable to female-to-female mentorship? I really don't know, but I would love to hear from women on this.

The inner circle of the opposite sex – No boys allowed

Being of the opposite sex in a female-centric environment, I realized quickly that there was an inner circle I'd never be able to penetrate. I imagine it must be somewhat comparable to how many women feel in a male-dominated work environment.

Even though I worked well with the whole team, I was never IN on the inside jokes, infrequently went out on lunches and hardly ever talked about my personal life. It was nobody's fault really. I was a man in a woman's world. We wouldn't relate to each other anyway.

Still, if I was working in a male dominated environment with a male superior, I'd certainly want to feel included.

About two months into my first job, our team moved into a work area we shared with the finance department, aka "the finance guys" – a male-dominated team that loved to socialize.

I worked on a bunch of cross-functional projects with them and for the short time they were there, I actually felt more involved. My energy level rose and productivity escalated too.

They ultimately ended up leaving the location, putting me back in the minority. But during that short period, I realized the importance of having a group of people you can relate to in the office.

Men and women climb a different ladder

Generation gaps aside, I know a male boss understands me a lot better than a female boss. Though I'm no longer "climbing the corporate ladder," I've come to understand that a male's ascension is rather different than a female's. Consequently, wouldn't it be more logical for a man to learn the ropes from an older, more experienced man?

But maybe I'm completely off on this one. Maybe one day I'll have a female boss I'd prefer to work with over any male. Until then, limited experience is all I have to go on.