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J.T. O’Donnell is a career coach, advice columnist and author. In addition to her book, 
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When Baby Boomers say to me, “Those kids today, they can be anything they want to be and yet none of them seem committed to being a professional,” I secretly cringe, bite my tongue, and then choose my words carefully. I actually think the opportunity to be anything we want to be is, as the saying goes: a blessing and a curse. Yes, the younger generations have more opportunities than ever before, but, with that comes the added pressure to choose wisely, as well as a sense of obligation to explore lots of options. Picking a career today is like going to a super-sized grocery store and standing at the front with your hands tied behind your back, then being told to select just one food without reading the label, fully knowing you will be expected to eat it five days a week for at least the next year of your life. To me, it’s no wonder why ‘career,’ no matter how you spell it, is an ugly, four-letter word to recent college grads.
The bad news is there’s no such thing as a ‘Career Fairy.’ As much as we want to believe that eventually the perfect job will come along and lead us to the ideal career path – it doesn’t. Yet, I also know there is a way to start narrow down the unlimited number of career choices, and it begins by identifying our Unique Gifts.
What’s a Unique Gift? It is a skill a person possesses that is innate within them. It’s something we are so adept at doing that others seek us out and ask for our help. Everyone has a Unique Gift. In fact, I find most of the people have several of them. The key is to identify your own Unique Gifts and then choose a career path that will allow you to leverage them on a daily basis. Sounds easy, right? There’s a catch…
Most people have a very difficult time identifying their Unique Gifts. Why? Because they come so naturally to us, they don’t feel special. We hear the term “unique” and assume that we must be good at something that is rare or different. Not true. The reality is that our Unique Gifts will be possessed by others as well. Yet, when we use them, we are so good at them, we naturally excel. We draw others in to us. We get respect. We get results.
So, how can we identify our Unique Gifts? We can start by answering several questions, soliciting the thoughts of their friends and family so that they can get help seeing what they can’t always see in themselves. The questions are as follows:
1) What do friends and family members come to you for advice for most often and why?
2) What three personal accomplishments are you most proud of and why?
3) What are the three things you are most knowledgeable about and why?
The answers to these question will provide some interesting insight into your Unique Gifts. Look for patterns. And from there, start to research careers that would let you leverage your Unique Gifts. There is no simple way to finding a career you love. The best we can do is to continue to assess ourselves and become more aware of our professional strengths. This much I know: a job that lets you do what you do best, is a job that you’ll enjoy most in the long run. Just ask Michael Jordan…
J.T. O’Donnell is a career consultant who specializes in helping new professionals find greater satisfaction on-the-job. She provides free career information and resources just for Millennial at http://www.jtodonnell.com/spark/spark_land.html.
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Leave your thoughts here. (24 responses)
- 1 Pingback on Aug 21st, 2007 at 11:20 pm
- 2 Pingback on Aug 21st, 2007 at 11:20 pm
The reason I disagree with this, and all the other “talent evaluations,” is because they assume someone will enjoy doing what they excel at. That is not necessarily the case, nor would I ever want to suggest someone start down a path they don’t enjoy, just because they’re good at it.
I think of Good Will Hunting when people try to bring these things up. I don’t think an example that extreme is all too common, but I know some of the things that come most natural to me are boring and unfulfilling. I have no interest in them.
For many, this might be sound advice that would indeed provide greater satisfaction in the workplace. I also imagine it’s a great starting point when people have trouble narrowing down the field to anything at all. But for another group, perhaps just as many, suggesting that natural inclination or ability should trump interest and enjoyment is not sound advice.
I agree with Nathan. I read to the end of this article and felt a bit of a panic thinking, but I really don’t have any unique talents! Not that I could turn into a job, anyway.
I also have so many things that I’m good at, not fantastic at, but good at, and I’d prefer to use all those skills at once towards something I enjoy doing. By nature of a job or just life, things will sift and some interests and abilities will rise to the top, but I don’t want to commit to them right away. I want to try many things out, even if I’m not particularly good at it. I think the article is somehwat contradictory in that sense. It asks you not worry about picking a career right away, but then asks you to narrowly define what you do as to what your unique talents are. Passion comes first. The ability to do a good job will naturally follow.
I think one thing you guys could both do is solicit feedback from those close to you (personally and professionally). It’s sometimes hard to “know thyself” without some input.
Simply sending an email with a deadline (one week) asking about examples when you’ve excelled will provide so much feedback. I did this about a year ago and it’s amazing. What you think you’re good at may be completely different from how people around you feel.
Wow! Glad to see the post got a reaction - even such negative ones!
I’d like to challenge Nathan’s statement that doing what you are good at is boring. If you take a closer look at the three questions I suggest you find answers to, you’ll see they all focus in on things that have made you feel satisfied. Helping friends and family is rewarding, things we are proud of accomplishing are exciting, and things we are most knowledgeable about are interesting. None of that says ‘boring’ to me.
In response to Rebecca: I don’t say not to choose a career, I simply make the point that it is not an easy process. Assessing our Unique Gifts is, as I stressed, a starting point for someone who wants a logical way to help narrow down the choices.
However, I do agree whole heartedly with Rebecca on the following: finding passion for your work will make you do a good job. Yet, that’s the question most recent grads are struggling with, “What’s my passion?” The process of identifying what you are good at and what has brought you a sense of satisfaction in the past is a good place to start, don’t you think?
All I ask is that you take the time, make the effort, and give the exercise a try…what have you got to lose?
Thanks for the feedback!
I have found the concept of “Deeply Embedded Life Interests (DELI)” to be a very helpful way to frame this type of career thinking. Butler and Waldroop at HBS have published a widely referrenced article on “Job Sculpting” to improve employee satisfaction and retention. However, it is also necessary for all employees to understand what their DELIs are. Here is how they define a DELI:
“…deeply embedded life interests are long-held, emotionally driven passions, intricately entwined with personality and thus born of an indeterminate mix of nature and nurture. Deeply embedded life interests do not determine what people are good at — they drive what kinds of activities make them happy. At work, that happiness often translates into commitment. It keeps people engaged, and it keeps them from quitting.”
According to the author’s people are motivated by 1 to 3 of the following DELIs:
1. Application of Technology
2. Quantitative Analysis
3. Theory Development and Conceptual Thinking
4. Creative Production
5. Counseling and Mentoring
6. Managing People and Relationships
7. Enterprise Control
8. Influence Through Language and Ideas
Its just another way to frame your thinking when trying to decide what you want to do “when you grow up”. I highly encourage everyone to check out more at hbswk.hbs.edu/archive/875.html
@ JT- Aplogies, I certainly didn’t mean to come off as negative! I’m glad you have clarified. I do think in a sense you are right about the “unique talents.” I have a weird affinity for database work- for some reason, I love to make reports, queries, entering stuff in. It’s downright dorky, I know. I don’t want it to be my career, but I do feel satisfaction when I’ve finished with this type of job. I think that’s the problem with how I define a lot of my “unique talents.” They seem impressively dull- ha! On the flip side, when I think about what I’m passionate about, mostly creative endeavors, it occurs to me that I’m good at those as well, but I just think of them as things I enjoy doing. I’ll give the full excercise a try tonight.
@ Devin- How did you explain the project in your email? I can’t imagine that people wouldn’t think it was a bit conceited to ask… Hm. Isn’t there a web app that allows you to collect anonymous opinions? That might be good.
In reading the article and then reading Rebecca’s initial reaction, I had an interesting thought. I think the biggest hangup with self-assessments is that you think you’re supposed to be looking for the one magic bullet skill or aptitude that will lead to a life of fulfillment, riches, and happiness (hence the panic feeling when you realize that you’re not going to be the best in the world at one single skill; there are 6 billion people here after all).
In fact, your aptitudes are nothing special, many people will have aptitudes in the same areas as you. However, almost no one will have the exact same combination of aptitiudes as you. What you should be looking for in this search is what careers your entire skill group lends itself too.
For a very simple example, with Rebecca… if she designs websites, writes very well, and has an interest in non-profit work, she needs to look at the best fit for all these skills. She might not be able to compete with the best web designers and she might not be able to outwrite the best copywriters but combined with her passion for non-profit work she might be a star webmaster for a non-profit organization or a great consultant who revamps non-profit websites/content and find fulfillment there (this would be an example of a niche that requires a combination of skills and interests not just being a skilled web designer or skilled copywriter).
Does this make sense?
I’d like to challenge Nathan’s statement that doing what you are good at is boring. If you take a closer look at the three questions I suggest you find answers to, you’ll see they all focus in on things that have made you feel satisfied. Helping friends and family is rewarding, things we are proud of accomplishing are exciting, and things we are most knowledgeable about are interesting. None of that says ‘boring’ to me.
I guess my problem then is the idea that “Unique Gifts” are either something you are good at, or they are something that satisfies you. They may sometimes be both, but that is not a necessary relationship, and they are not interchangeable. And yet, you sort of tread the line between what exactly they are throughout the piece.
I agree, your first two questions focus on satisfaction. Answering those would put you well on your way to finding a job that satisfies you. However the third is not so cut and dry. One can be knowledgeable or have a natural ability which allows them to quickly reach a subject matter expert level nearly immediately, even if they find this potentially boring. Yet they are all treated as one in the same. Later on you suggest looking up careers which harness your unique gifts, but as I’ve just pointed out that could be looking based on satisfaction (questions 1 and 2) or natural inclination/skillset (potentially 3). This is where I find the contradiction.
The specific statement and things we are most knowledgeable about are interesting. I absolutely disagree with, simply based on what was mentioned above.
I do agree with the fact that if you pursue what you desire, you will find ways to apply your strengths, and I believe that we young professionals/new grads have a hard time pinpointing our passion, and the best place to start is with your interests.
Thanks Nathan,
I appreciate your comments on the post and I can tell you’ve given this a lot of thought.
Here’s one thing to consider: when we know a lot about a subject, it’s because something interested us or gave us incentive enough to want to keep learning about it. No one is forced into being a subject-matter expert. You do it because you are drawn to it in some way - to me, the reasons you became so knowledgeable on a subject are worth exploring…
I think I’m going to have to side with Nathan on this one, but also throw in a little Brad.
I think my current situation demonstrates Nathan’s point quite well. Since I was a kid, I’ve always been a talented writer. I was in all kinds of clubs and competitions and the like. My writing ability has served me well in many of my past positions, but now I’m working in communications (not my first choice) and writing constantly. I’m bored out of my mind. Just because you’re great at something doesn’t mean you’ll enjoy a career from it.
The same situation applies to when I was in high school, and having had years of vocal training, had to deal with everyone pushing me to study voice in college. The problem was I loved it too much, and I knew, even at 18, if I had to do it everyday, it wouldn’t be fun anymore. So I didn’t.
Agreeing with Brad, I would never want a job where I have to write nearly as much as I do right now, but if I could combine a small amount of writing with my love of a specific non-profit area, and my love of politics, I’d be golden. It’s not just about finding something your good at. It’s about finding a passion, first and foremost, and using your skills to support it.
J.T.,
I’ll have to side with Nathan on this one. Sometimes we WERE interested in something, learned about it, had a knack for it, etc…but then something changed. Maybe as you learned more you realized it wasn’t quite as exciting, maybe you changed as a person and thus are now on a different wavelength. Maybe anything…but just because I’m good at something doesn’t mean I necessarily enjoy it.
I used to be an avid reader of articles and forums about new computer hardware and the latest software coming out, etc. I learned how to build computers, how to fix them when they broke, etc. I got quite good at it. I worked all through college doing computer tech support, and you know what? I’m still great at it, but after about the first year it stopped having any real satisfaction or excitement to it.
My friends and family still come to me with computer problems, and I still help them because 1) I’m nice and 2) I know that I can probably fix it and they probably can’t (otherwise why would they have come to me for help?)…but I don’t enjoy it any more. I don’t find it satisfying. It’s just something I do for the people around me because I know I have the ability.
Now, don’t get me wrong…I absolutely think people should do what they enjoy. And, in most cases, there are probably things we enjoy that we are good at and things we enjoy that we are not so good at. I used to really enjoy playing baseball, but I knew I wasn’t all THAT great, so I didn’t bother trying to pursue a pro baseball career or anything, that would’ve been foolish.
I guess that’s where question 2 comes in. For me, I can think of plenty of examples that answer 1 and 3, but I would want limited exposure to in a job. But for me, question 2 is just as hard as asking “What am I passionate about?” or “What do I want to do with my life?”…so really that puts me back to square one.
Nathan, don’t try to give me or anyone else life advice based on the plot lines of movies.
Jacqui (cool spelling BTW) and James,
I might not be making myself clear enough about the purpose of the exercise. There was a time when you were both motivated to learn what you’ve become experts at. It’s the reasoning behind the motivation that helps you connect the dots, just as Brad did for Rebecca in his post.
Jacqui - why did you write so much in your youth? What inspired you to keep progressing your skills? And doesn’t it say something that being ‘pushed’ to pursue vocals turned you off to it? Intrinsic motivation (a desire to do something for our own reasons, not someone else’s) provides insight into what motivates us without reward - the true secret to career satisfaction. The same applies for James and computers.
Gen Y has been raised on pop-behaviorism. The idea that you should be given an incentive (a.k.a. a bribe) for everything you do. All that external motivation has made it difficult for some Gen Y to understand what drives them so that they can tap into their internal motivation and find work that satisfies. I love my work with young professionals because the exercises I have them complete help them to understand how to use their unique combination of strengths, skills and interests to feel more purposeful in their career progression. (If you want to learn more about how history and society have impacted your generation, read “10 Tips College Grads Should Know - But No One Ever Tells Them” - www.jtodonnell.com/wordpress/?cat=7)
Can I suggest you both try to do the second part of the exercise: soliciting the feedback of others so that your point of view isn’t biased. You both immediately tried to answer the questions, which is great, you are both quite confident in your personal perspectives. But, the added perspective about how others see you is just as important for gaining insight that can help you professionally.
Thanks again, and if you ever want to chat about your particular situations in detail, I’d love it.
Nathan, don’t try to give me or anyone else life advice based on the plot lines of movies.
Tim,
Thanks for your utterly useless response. If you’d like to point out where I was giving any advice, let alone life advice, please do so. I was not. I was, however, disagreeing with a subtle point in the piece, and was using a popular movie reference in lieu of writing 2-3 long paragraphs of personal explanation (Later done by Jacqui and James). I make no attempt to speak on anyone other than myself when I say, the reason this blog holds my interest is the lack of people like yourself. If I wanted to read random attack comments that ignored the entirety of a post, I’d do it elsewhere (and I do). Next time you feel like adding absolutely nothing, don’t.
J.T.,
A lot of good points. It’s true that a majority of us are more directed by random events towards our ultimate career than anything else. The studies also suggest that most of us are not truly satisfied with our careers, and this problem will only get worse with the upcoming generations as they try to figure out what to become with all of the opportunities that will exist as more baby-boomers start to retire. I remember taking a career development course in junior college where I took all the personality and other tests to find out what I was suited for. The tests revealed that I was very people and service oriented and said I would be a good candidate for either a Police Officer or Fire Fighter. I’m currently a Benefits Manager (not too far away - I just put out different types of fires!).
I also remember going through a series of sermons at my church on discovering the unique gifts that God has given us. It outlined about seven different gifts, from leadership, administrator, encourager, acts of service, and so forth. I don’t think that it is so much trying to identify the specific job or career that fits you best, but finding out what gifts you have and then looking at where (or what type of work) you could apply your gifts to. For example, as an encourager you could consider becoming a teacher, a coach, a manger of almost any kind, a consultant or even a motivational speaker.
We all hope that we have a fulfilling career when all is said and done. More than that, we all hope to live a meaningful life as well as to leave a legacy when we die. To me, a career is just a stop along the road of life.
Alan,
I agree with all of your points about finding unique gifts and applying them. However, I cannot agree that a career is just a stop along the road of life. If this were the case, then we wouldnt even be having these discussions and people would just work to make money and not care about satisfaction or meaning. If you are working for the vast majority of your adult years and the majority of the hours in every week, then choosing the right career is one of the most important decisions we should ever make. Granted, you can choose to dabble in a few different careers along the way. A career is so much more than a stop on the road of life, it can dramatically impact and usually alter the road you take.
-Ryan
Ryan,
Maybe I exaggerated my point a bit, but I do see a lot more problems with careers damaging peoples’ lives more than I see peoples’ lives damaging careers. Let me explain further.
Case 1: The person who makes it all the way up the ladder in his/her career, who makes all the decisions, makes all the money, etc. What happens when he/she retires? It seems as though they are forgotten or replaced pretty quickly. In fact, if they put all their effort and emotions into their career and then leave it one day, they usually end up living very few years after retirement.
Case 2: The person who becomes a workaholic and works 10-12 hours a day. What about the toll it takes on his marriage and his family? Could that be part of the reason for the rate of divorce, drug and alcohol abuse and adultry in our country? Again, that decision comes in part from your career choices, doesn’t it?
Case 3: The amount of stress and politics we all go through as we get to higher levels in our career. It seems to me that a lot of people forgo becoming mnagers and higher levels because they don’t want to expose themselves to the responsibilities and political realities of the position. So in response, they don’t have the drive and passion to move up - they settle in and don’t move the bar higher in their lives (for their career).
I believe that when all is said and done, your career can be looked on as to what kind of a legacy you left (i.e., how many people you influenced, coached, mentored, exchanged views and ideas with). To me, that is more of a path on the road to life. While your career does take a huge amount of your time, I think that a lot of us could agree that we work because we need money. We look for jobs that will pay us well and that we can find satisfaction with. But how many people end up planning their career instead of letting it happen?
Alan,
I love your last paragraph.
Anyway, to expand this next point of yours a bit further:
“…they don’t have the drive and passion to move up - they settle in and don’t move the bar higher in their lives (for their career).”
Life is choice. Those who do have the drive and passion to move up sacrafice other things in their life. Everyone sacrafices something.
Those who don’t have that passion, don’t have it because they’ve decided that other things are more important to them.
You can’t have it all. Those who think they can are riding on the river of denial. We always think about the road not taken–and we should. We can learn from that for the future and, too, to realize that while we’ve had to give up on some things in life, overall, we’ve made the right choices in life.
One thing I learned from working is that everyone is replaceable. Everyone. At first it sounds depressing, but when you think about it
a bit longer, it’s truly a freeing concept.
oh, dear…of course it’s sacrifice, not sacrafice.
sigh
Tim,
Thanks for adding the touches on my comments. You brought up a good point - that every decision we make involves a sacrifice of some type. We can and do look back and ask ourselves, “What if”. That can drive you crazy if you reflect on it too much.
I think the current story lines I am hearing about women who stay at home verses women who go back to work after they have children is a huge decision as well as a huge sacrifice. I’d like to see the discussion after Employee Revolution writes a piece on that one. We men have it easier - we have taken an unwritten oath to work our entire career. Some women, on the other hand, have to decide on whether they should stay at home with their children or go back to work to earn money and/or continue their career. And that decision, my friend, has a heck of a lot more meaning than on what career we choose and find full enlightenment during the trip.
Alan,
One more thing on this…
“But how many people end up planning their career instead of letting it happen?” Great question!
I wonder how many of those who plan their career actually get to where they thought they wanted to go? And, if they get there, will they be truly happy.
I won’t call it career drifting (or maybe I will), but as one progress in their life/career, I bet many naturally, if not unconsciously, drift to those careers/jobs that provide a better fit for them. I certainly never planned to be in my current career–far from it–but I love what I do. No regrets at all! And now looking back it all it makes sense–I can see how things developed in my career–what new things I was exposed to, gaining wisdom, why I made certain choices, etc. and what led to where I am now.
Life and work experience opened my eyes–
one discovers new things, learns different skills, finds new passions–You start to learn all those things you didn’t know that you didn’t know! It takes a while to truly discover yourself. This kind of career track may, in my opinion, lead one to a full and very enjoyable career.
Sure, “life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans,”… “but if you try sometime, you just might find, you get what you need!”
sorry, couldn’t resist putting in some classic rock quotes!
Here is a great post from Scott Adams (Dilbert) that goes right to what I was getting at regarding how to successfully find your niche in the world. dilbertblog.typepad.com/the_dilbert_blog/2007/07/career-advice.html